I know how you feel about sundays. That was the day that WAS and I spent the whole day together. But you can reclaim that day. Still do the stuff that you two liked to do. But introduce something new to it. That way it has changed and becomes your day. Remember before it was your day. But you shared it with your wife. Enjoyed it with your wife. Now you gotta learn to enjoy it for yourself. Then down the road when you share that day out. Your enjoying it for yourself and you are enjoying that your sharing it out freely. Unconditional love. This is just a little piece to the that puzzle. Well thats what I think. If I am a little off on that thought, then I would like some advice there.
Remember that she is excited about leaving because its new and exciting. The self has taken over.
You need to be excited as well. Its a new life for you as well. Reguardless of the outcome. This is a new life for you. You can take the negatives of all this and have a horrorable second half. Or you can learn, adapt, become a better Indy. A better Indy will be a better person to himself, children, family and future partner. Positive things happen to positive people.
Indy no matter what. NO R TALK.
WHAT LIFE DO YOU WANT ?
Seriously
List each item with the starting words...
I would like....
Then take the top 5 and rewrite them to start with the words
I choose....
Then we can help you towards those goals.
Take a day or two to really think about this and write down what ever hits your mind. You should come up with a list of 50 items or so... No Item too small. O.K.
WHAT LIFE DO YOU WANT ?
Time to start swimming up stream for a change.
Cutter - I would love to reclaim Sunday - or any down time for that matter. Right now, downtime means my mind thinks of all the bad stuff. I hate that. I try to keep busy, but unless it's something that takes 100% concentration, my mind still goes. I am hoping my counselor will help with that.
As I said earlier, I'm not so sure she is excited about leaving. More about feeling safe and not used. I know I should have made it more difficult to leave and start her new life, but I didn't. I relaize I am allowing her to cake eat, by going on the XMAS vacation, having full access to the kids and house after her move out, but I'm putting my kids needs first. They may be teenagers, but they love her deeply. So much so, that they are happy for her. Seriously.
I think it may be a little late for no R talk. We have had so many. But that's one db principal, even I can handle from here forward. Seems like it's the easy way out for her, but it's a fundamental of dbing, so I'm there.
As for what life, I want - I don't think any of the pros would like the answer that comes to mind first, so I better take a while to think of it.
Ok...got all that off my chest (but not my mind - dammit) time to concentrate on work. That is why they give me this desk........
