Hope and heartache

[awest1217]

Good for you for doing what is best for you and just staying out of the house. I agree with the imagining that our spouses have life better. Sometimes I think they are probably as sad as we are, but they try to find happiness in other ways because they don't want to work at the marriage, but the thing is that those other things don't fulfill them so they are just as upset later.

It is really refreshing to see a dad who is willing to do anything for his girls. As for the Chicago trip, I recommend not giving any more money and the same with summer camps. The girls will be ok with not having those things and that is a reality that W needs to deal with. If the girls complain, she needs to see that is part of what she is doing to them by wanting a D. Instead of the chicago trip and getting the American Girl Dolls, is there something less expensive you can all do together that weekend. Maybe a mini vaca that will still be fun, but not as expensive. Maybe get them something else small they want.

The anger you are feeling is normal, but don't live there forever, which is why I recommended the forgiveness book because it isn't about just making your marriage work, but I took it more as making my life better because I see no hope for my M until H is willing to stop having OW, especially the latest one.

Hope your week goes well, and stay strong!

Sad girl -
I understand your sitch. My H does not really visit my S2 much. He will come when it is convenient for him or he just is feeling like being a dad. I told him this last time he left that he needed to set a schedule to see S and stick to it because that is what is best for me and S, but he has not done it. My S is not handling it too well. He understands daddy is gone and when H was home for 2 weeks kept telling him to leave because I think he missed having me all to himself and H does not like him doing certain things that I don't mind. Since H left again, S will not sleep in his room and he will not even go to sleep unless I am holding him. I think that is him being scare of me leaving too. I also have seen some agression so I think he is mad, but being 2 he doesn't know how to handle it. It is hard when H does not want to see his kids. Just give them lots of love, let them know it is not their fault, and just listen to them if they can express their fears.