Detachment

[brknheart]

Just remember that you have power in this also; if you decide that it's not worth the effort to keep her, then it sounds like getting her out of your life will be easy.

That can be a useful last-resort technique -- giving in and pushing towards the divorce may upset her thinking; why, all of a sudden, are you so eager to get rid of her?

However, be warned that a LRT cannot be a bluff. You have to be OK with the outcome if she decides to keep going. If you're not, and she realizes it, then you've lost whatever leverage you have left to change things.

At this point, Im moving on with my life. The way I feel, the only way I could take her back is if she admits what she has handled the separation is wrong and is sorry for this. Then she has to truly want to make the M work. Will this happen, I highly doubt it. I feel like she took our M, put it in a blender and pressed the highest setting. Im already starting to pack my things, making plans to move, and she doesnt seem to care. Taking these steps definitely is helping me detach from her.

Deep, good post. I can definitely understand the other S going into WAS mode when they detach, especially if the original WAS handled things very poorly. Sometimes there is a point of no return.