From what you wrote, it seems like your husband needs some tough love Robx and Gucci style. I suggest you contact these two guys...they have great tough love advice...very counterintuitive.
Hang in there.
-LFH
ME: 38 W: 35 D2.5 and S5 Married 12 years Separated (same house, different rooms) INILWYAM by W: 4/16/2009 The day W requested a D: 4/17/2009