He probably scares himself. Just think about how much shame he might have to face if he comes back to your M whole-heartedly and breaks it off with the OW. Maybe he has realisations that hes made a terrible mistake, that could freak him out too. I know that that was one of the things that kept my H from entertaining the idea of reconciling.

And I wasnt referring to you being ashamed- just him, I guess I should have said that if HES doing something he has to be ashamed of...!

I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...