Not sure what to do

[bluerain]

What had she been asking you to do as part of you working on your M? What are some of the things that you plan on doing now? Have you read about the 180's? Basically its taking a behavior that you know doesnt work, or is destructive and doing the complete opposite. For instance, if when she tries to air a concern, you lost your temper, now you would validate her and calmly listen. If she would ever ask you to do something, and you would take days to get around to it, do it as soon as possible. That kind of thing.

You should also be doing things to remove yourself from the thick of your situation. Thats called Getting a Life (GAL), is there anything that you have ever wanted to do but have been putting off? Learning to ski, or garden or take a class, go back to school, join a fire dept, start jogging. The focus of this is to do positive productive things for yourself, as part of making yourself a more positive, well rounded person. And detaching a little from your W will give you something else to focus on, and it will make your W a little curious about what exactly you have been up to!