Spoke with my lawyer the other day, and her lawyer is actually writing up the 90 day set aside. I was calling my WAW's bluff. Didn't think she'd actually do it. But she did, now it's in my hands to decide if I want to go thru with it. I do want my marriage to survive, but it's tough to put up with all the script, as you all know.
Last Thursday, the day after the boyfriend email, we were emailing each other about our D because she was sick. Then out of the blue, she writes that a particular song reminds her of us. Pretty much a wtf moment for me. I read the lyrics and could see some of it. I responded by telling her that Dead Memories (Slipknot) was more fitting. She said that hers was closer, which in turn I said that it depends on who's perspective, because its Dead Memories for me, cause that's all that is left. She responded by asking that we get a babysitter so that we could talk. (seems the only times she makes the slightest little turn around is when I put the finality of divorce in the picture, or at least when I'm able to make it sound like it's my decision)
The next day we were meant to go to a wake together (friend's father had died) instead of the school halloween party. Babysitter was lined up, and I had prepared myself for a heavy evening. Mid day, she calls and says she can't make it because she had the flu. She had been ill when she dropped the kids off by me in the morning. Some bad stuff going around. Either way, the talk never happened, I haven't brought it up, and she is basically back to what she was before.
Yesterday she invited me over for supper and if I'd watch the kids while she bowled tonight. I was a bit leary at first after the last time I did that for her with her facebook remark. But the way I see it, I get to see my kids and also show that I am so much better than the OM. I will not resort back to the me that came out after the bomb.
I did take care of the kids tonight. She made a nice supper, even offered me a glass of wine (she never drank it before we split) I had a great time with the kids while she was home, very happy and upbeat. She left and took D with her, I stayed home with S. We had a good evening just the two of us. She got back, and I thought maybe she'd want to have the R talk with the kids in bed. Didn't get the vibe from her so I left, didn't hang around or wait.
Next time, she'll have to bring the kids by me. I've been strong with being at "her" house, but I do not want to be there for hours with OM's crap in the house. Gotta set that boundary.
M 32 WAW 34 D - 5 S - 4 PA 1/09 Moved out 3/09 She filed 5/09 90 Day Postponement 11/09 State Dismissed case 4/10 Moved home 9/10
