I think my IC uses the cognitive behavioral therapy also for the general stuff right now. After I finish the separation and things calm down, she wants to do something called Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy (EMDR) for the PTSD part of things. It sounds kinda new.
Gardener, We had a good conversation about cognitive dissonance and cognitive distortion while you were out. I was thinking about you when we were discussing.
_________________________ Me-41 W-39 M-15 yrs T-17 yrs D-12 S-9 S-8 B 5/08 S 1/09
Been a week or so sense I've posted so I thought I drop in.
Speaking of dropping, I dropped the bomb on my W this afternoon. Basically told her I was done. ILYBNILWY. We got married for all the wrong reasons. We've been using each other, etc, etc. Basically told her to please give me some space. Stop calling all the time and let me move on with my life. I then proceeded to go play cards with some new friends from meetup. Also stopped by my local watering hole. W called twice. I did respond with a simple hi text. Not trying to be an AH but come on. Either your in the game or out of the game. If your in I got your blind side. If not....
Next week we will have a heart to heart. General concept we are both done and there are two directions. Try and make lemonade or close down the lemonade stand. Either way I'm fine. I'd like to make another run cause I think we can make something great here. All we have to do is learn how to accept and love each other. We have already proven we can be good friends. Isn't that something to build from?
She did for the first time today make a reference to our family. This is big. Never and I do mean never has she ever talked about "our" family. Simple and stupid comment like "wow ADD does seem to be a trait in this family." I know I'm reaching but when I say never I mean never in our marriage has she made such a comment.
D is kind of stalled at this point. Close to being tossed out of court. Judge has given us 10 days to put together trial dates. No action on either side. She has not done a single thing sense filing in March. We have gone to mediation and have everything we need to finish this but nothing has happened. She says this must be saying something. Sigh. Cat and mouse games are not my thing anymore.
Retro still scheduled for February.
Time to either get busy living or get busy dieing.
_________________________ Me-41 W-39 M-15 yrs T-17 yrs D-12 S-9 S-8 B 5/08 S 1/09
Either your in the game or out of the game. If your in I got your blind side. If not....