The only way to deal with it is to detach. You are on an emotional roller coaster and only you can decide to get off. Once you decide to just roll with things day by day then lots of contact or no contact or something in between wont make a bit of difference to you.
It seems odd to me that a counselor would focus on the marriage part when your H has no interest in being part of the marriage counseling process. I would think it is far more important to focus on you.
Also, the WAS and the LBS have very different perception of things. What you thought was a HUGE breakthrough could have been nothing more than a casual chat in your H's eyes. Because you are not detached you have expectations.
Everybody needs to have hope about something. Have hope for you and your children. That is the sort of hope you can control.
