What to do, what to do?

[LuLu]

This week is getting crazier. My stepdad sent me this email this morning:

I feel like I owe you a bit of an explanation as to why I refuse to see your H at this point. As you might expect I am hugely disappointed with his decision to move out. Actually, not so much with his decision to move out, but with of his decision to stay out. If he would have moved out and stayed two weeks or a month to “get his head straight” I would have been very understanding of that. But to stay gone 4 months, I do not feel he has a right to make that decision at this point. If E had married A, had two babies and then E left, I would not have been shocked. Anyone could have seen that coming. However, your H was in this with both feet. He owned the decision to have two babies as much as you did. For him to now say “I don’t like the way this is going, I’m moving out” infuriates me. I believe your H is neglecting his duties as a man to stay gone this long. I do not respect him as a man any longer. To invite me to be around your H at this point is to invite an “incident”. I think it is best that I stay away from him. I can not be around him and just act like nothing is wrong. I am not saying I will always feel this way, but as long as he is copping out and living his convenient little life over at his friend's house it is best I am not around him. If he moves back home and begins to act like a man and father again, with time I will get over it. However, until he moves back home, trust me, you want to keep us apart.

I asked him if I could forward it to H. We've been trying to figure out what to do about the holidays and H was going to contact stepdad to try to smooth things over before this email. Stepdad has been avoiding family get togethers and this morning finally told me why. Anyway, I also had an ulterior motive... nobody has told H that was he's doing is crazy. I figured this was my chance to have someone besides me do it. Stepdad gave me the go ahead. I forwarded H the email this morning saying FYI.

I get a call about 30 mins ago. H is pissed. Never wants to talk to my stepdad for a very long time...not welcomed in our house, blah, blah. THEN he says he wants to move back in because of the girls.
M: That's not a good reason to move back in
H: I'd like to
M: Are you wanting to work on the marriage?
H: Yes, I will do it for the girls
M: Will you go to marriage counseling?
H: If we can afford it
M: We'd have to make it a priority (stinks that retrouvaille is not until Feb)
H: Okay
M: I don't know, is this the right thing? You shouldn't be basing this decision on the girls.
H: I can't move back in this weekend but how about next weekend?
M: Let's talk about this later

WTF?! Don't get me wrong, this is great. BUT, it's very strange. I feel like he's only doing it to Man-Up to my stepdad and not because he's realized that he still loves me and wants to be with me. He told me Sunday morning that he's still not sure if he loves me anymore. Does it even matter why he's doing it? He's still totally in the fog. How do I DB living under the same roof. Someone help me. This is not the way I thought we would try to reconcile. I'm so confused!!