The past 3 days have been crazy. W wakes me up yesterday with a request for money. I told her she signed papers that take me off of her bank account and I couldn't transfer money. Her reply was "you can go to the bank on your lunch and do it there." I didn't think I should have to do that. This is what you do when you're a unit and I'm tired of feeling used.
W comes home early last night to find her new dog had damaged the house. She immediately lays into me and asks why I allow it. I told her this happened before I got home when the kids were here. She asked why they didn't do anything. I told her what I've told her several times, the guys go upstairs to their rooms and don't care what the dog is doing. She then said they wanted the dog. I told her no they didn't. I told her they were too scared to tell her this when she said she was getting a dog.
Long story short, she call me a liar and says I'm turning "her" kids against her. She then issued threats and such. I told her the kids will not ever say what they truly feel because they fear it will make her mad or hurt her feelings. I then told her the girl twice this week said she wanted to come live with me after this thing happens. Of course she goes off and acts crazy calling me liars and once again making vile accusations. She then began to refer to my letter and told that it was a lie and she would sh@! on it and such. She said if I loved her I wouldn't be making up lies and whatever.
I told her that as she doesn't believe me, ask that cop buddy of hers or whoever she really can trust to talk to them and find out what I say is the truth. Well she goes upstairs and wakes the girl up and asks her for the truth. She lied again. I walked in and used a fail safe I put in her. I told her once that bad things may be said about me and the time for total truth would come. She began to tell mommy the truth of what she's been saying for the past few months. She then asked me what should she ask the boy about. I told her what ever. I hate to say it but the shock she was experiencing was good to me. About time she got back into the real world. The fact is the kids don't see her and see that she's changed big time.
Later, I smoke a stogie and she comes out with more noise. I didn't get an apology for being called a liar. She then began to talk about the letter again and how I didn't show that I cared and such. I back slid to the what can I do to show you thing. I know I shouldn't have. She then went into why she was thinking I had an affair and such. She went into the classic the last X years weren't real and such. When I called her on that, her reply was "J---- you're just hearing what you want to hear." I messed up by defending myself against such an onslaught. I still hear in her voice the need to trust me but she can't. At this point, right now, I don't know if I want to DB. To hell with her. I'm tired right now. I told her that I feel based on what she just said, she used me to get out of her situation and into a house she never could afford. She thought that was a bad thing for me to say but that's what I feel. I feel like a used whore right now.
She then said that after she got back from the Bahamas, she was independent and I couldn't deal with it. I come from a family of strong women, cops, civic leaders and such. That mess doesn't matter to me. I told her that I thought she had done something while she was there. Of course right after coming back, she stopped taking her meds.
Gang, I'm tired of this mess. I'm not sure if I have the energy to keep going. I think at this time, I just want my cut of the assets and move on to start a new life. She's haning the kids over my head saying there may be a problem with me seeing them if I "%@!k" her. Her definition of this is getting what I deserve such as a fair share of the value of the house. I could get %50 but I only want %10.
If this is the way it has to be, I guess so be it. I may as well get used to the idea of never seeing the kids again. This breaks my heart of course more than anything else. As I said, Right Now, I don't want her crazy azz. I don't want to be friends with her and I could care less what happens to her. But her kids, scratch that, our kids mean the world to me. At least I have my nephews.
