Is this the end of my marriage?

[P17]

I'm just morally confused and wondering how it will affect the DB'ing. Maybe this is the right way to go or maybe it will kill the M completely.

You do sound very confused b/c one second you are despartly in love with your W and the next second you "really like" those two women you met on line--and talking about commiting adultry. Don't you think you need to slow down a bit until you know your own mind? You don't have to be in any hurry. You sound too dangerous to let lose out there with all those women!

Sandi2,

I love my W and I think I always will. Whether it's old romantic nonsense or not, she is the love of my life and I miss her, our M and most of all the future we had planned, terribly.

My W has moved on - whether that is permanently or temporarily. I feel I need to move on too. That doesn't mean jumping into somebody's bed but it does mean, for me, finding 'somebody else', whether it's a friend or otherwise.

I don't think I could commit adultery. I think that would be a step in the wrong direction for me. I'm just curious about what others have done.

Over these last two days, I have been feeling better. Although after being here I understand it's simply a chemical thing. I am chatting to other people who show an interest in me and there is a little bit of excitement there. I can only assume my W is feeling exactly the same way with OM (although much more so as she is living with him)? However when that excitement goes or those people go, the feelings will come back that I will need to deal with. I think that is the attraction - the interest, the chemicals affecting how I am feeling.

Maybe something like this, as PDT did, will remind my W or what we had. I doubt it, but it's possible.

I will not give up on my M until the D is signed and sealed.

I see my IC today so I will bring it up with them too.