I just have this "feeling" that your W is trying to convince herself that it is truly over....as much as she is trying to convince you. I think that one reason she moved the date up to file for D was b/c she got scared that her feelings were going to defeat her attempts to go through with filing. So, while she felt strong....she moved the date forward.
I can understand why she sees "hope" in your eyes and is trying to make you believe it is really over. I'm sure your face gives you away whenever you look at her, but I doubt you can help it. I see every person's stitch as unique in it's own way.....and that is why I don't always give the same advise to every poster. I don't want to give you false hope, but I just can't see this R as over. Even if she goes through with filing.....I think there will be a future for the two of you.
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She'll need to change her schedule, find a sitter, etc... Is that too jerkish? I don't want to miss a chance to be with my kids, but she knows that I am there to help, and that won't be true in divorce.
No, it is not being a jerk at all. In fact, that is usually what I tell the LBH. Perhaps you need to consider being more tough, so that she will feel the "experience" of being single. I do believe you've been too available, but I knew why you were. I think you have shown her how badly you want to make this M work.
The C is a good sign.....I think. I'm not sure why she didn't have IC if she was trying to figure out how to "forgive" you. Why does she want you in the sessions? Something to think about. You know the C is going to give MC. How could he not? So, try to see this as a positive step, but at the same time, it will probably be painful. Sometimes, pain can bring forth good things......like childbirth.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
