Recovering yourself from all this

[ClingingToHope]

I sometimes wonder if STBX thinks about me, the brokenness of our family. I realize that I'll never stop. At least I don't hate her, nor do I feel guilty for my part in the breakup. I just accept that this is the was it is.

I'd like to say yes, she will. But who knows. There are some success stories on the board ... and a lot of others who fade away and we know what happened to them.

A coworker is dating a 24-year-old who has taken a liking to -- not in any romantic way. She thinks I look like Lance Armstrong. She gave me a bunch of her plates and silverware when I was moving out because she was moving to grad school.

So I'm over there and I meet her mom, who knows my situation. We start talking. This lady out of the blue tells her husband she wants a D 10 years ago. Totally blindsides him -- at least I saw mine coming.

She said the hardest part was getting through her H's despair. Once he accepted it, everything was fine. Turns out her ex is a guy I've known for 12 years and he's a wonderful guy.

She wraps up the story saying she wished she didn't feel the way she did. It would have been better for everyone financially.

So in this case, 10 years later, she hasn't looked back with any regrets -- or at least none that she betrayed me.

That's a depressing story but necessary. I alternate between I KNOW SOMEDAY she'll realize she made a mistake and thinking the fog may never lift -- at least here on Earth.