Counseling conundrums

[TrentC]

Perhaps more importantly, why were you willing to be "shared"?

First, he wore me down with two or three years of asking and me refusing. Then he dropped his own bomb on me (Get out, leave me and the kids, and don't take anything with you). I was a huge mess emotionally and scared to death- stay at home mom with no income and not a lot of job skills, and at that point I guess I figured I didn't have anything left to lose (I didn't realize my self-respect would be a casualty).

Translation: he emotionally abused you and destroyed your self-esteem in order to make you accept his selfish lifestyle.

Gardener and I are of the same mind -- you deserve a lot better than this guy.