Yes, I think DBing is a very effective concept. Perhaps my outcome expectations are diiferent to before now - as in before my goal was to save my marriage however generally I see DBing as taking the most effective approach. If I had gone with my feelings I would have called him up, ranted at him for as it turned out no reason and the whole thing would have blown up into a massive deal. Or, more likely not said anything at all and hidden my feelings and brewed silent resentment. I also wanted to do something different as my approach to him previously was clearly not working. He does not commit to a time or date in a respectful time frame leaving everything to the last moment with me having no odea what is going on.
I will probably always DB in a lot of aspects of my life. Doing what works, or what will be most effective in producing the outcome I want instead of what my reaction to a situation is.
I take your point about being more normal with him. I will try harder with this one.
