I just read... I am sorry Kat. You will be fine sweets. It doesnt mean anything for your life that he is engaged. Stay focused on you. You've been doing great the last months. Dont let this set you back. Love M
Thanks everyone. I think I am mostly in shock. Even though I have been sleeping well, last night I tossed and turned from 3 am on. I know I shouldn't be surprised and nothing says this is going to be some great long lasting relationship.
Ex told the boys on Thursday and asked them not to tell me as he wanted to(gee, so nice of him). He told the girls Sunday along with her two girls. He asked all of our kids to be in the wedding, which they all said no or as D10 told me, not in a million years.
Selfish little bubble they both live in.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Wow. Have you guys even been divorced a year? I can't imagine telling my son that I am getting married when I know he wouldn't even be in the wedding because of how he feels. ...."not in a million years"....lol, that's awesome. I'm sorry for the pain this causes you. *hugs*
It was a year on the 30th of July. Sort of a belated birthday present to me(my b-day is the 27th). Yep, he is a piece of work, so in tune with his kids that he asks them to do him this honor and they turn him down flat.
I am floating through today. Need to focus more.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Sorry about that Kat, but don't give it the thought it doesn't deserve.
If it makes you feel any better, my X got engaged last Thanksgiving, yes while STILL married, and still playing the "I'm not sure what I want game" with me. That hurt like hell I'll say.
Ironically, XW is being all nice and candid again and needs to talk, heh, maybe they just eloped or something (one of the few things I'm pondering she "needs to talk to me about"). I'm starting to wonder if this is the WAS plan of attack for this week?
Me 35/XW 33 S13 & S12 M: 10/17/98 OM & S: 07/08 D final 06/09/09 12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing" 06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10 06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
My X got married 14 days after our divorce was signed by a judge, two the womsn he swore was "just a friend" for the entire time were were separated. Then called me the next day to let me know so the kids wouldn't "say someting and surprise me." I wasn't surprised....I had money on it! LOL I actually won a bet because i knew that he would get married on that day....it was Valentine's Day after all and they were acting like high-schoolers, so it seemed likely to happen. I thought there might be an off-chance that she would think better of marrying a cheater within weeks of his divorce, but she proved to have as little class or concern for either of their children as he did. They are a perfect match.
In the long run I think she actually did me a favor. I would have stayed foreverr for the sake of my kids, but things would not have changed because he would never accept any reponsibility for the problems, and he would not have done the work to make it better. From what I hear things are still the same in his new marriage...he has had no personal growth.
No matter what surprise X has to spring on you, you can handle it! And isn't it funny how nice they get when they want something?! LOL Like you can't see right through that!
"You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf." Jon Kabat-Zinn
Kat, not that this would make you feel any better, but I have a buddy of mine whose W announced her engagement to her OM less than two months after they separated. (She's a certifiable loon, IMNSHO) When she saw how illegal that was and how bad that would look in her custody battle, she and the OM rescinded their announcement ... that is, until the D was final ten months later. Three days after the D, yep, they re-announced -- as if they were fooling anyone.
Whenever I think how crazy my ex is, I just think of my friend's case. There are some really, really crazy people in this world, and we only hear a fraction of it.
Yes kat, I too have a friend who's xh claimed he wasn't cheating, would never do that, told her she was nuts for suspecting anything.......until he married her 3 days after the judge signed the divorce decree! She says he was blowing the ink dry on the papers on his way down the aisle.
Not to make light of your situation at all, just hoping to bring a smile to your face in the hopes that you won't feel alone in this.
We love you!!!!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
