One word of caution about taking over the finances. Make sure that she is comfortable with that. In my sitch, my W was having some pretty big issues with feeling unappreciated. I was helping out at home, but unknnowingly, contributing to her feelings of inadequacy - "I can't do anything - you don't apprecaite me, you have to do it because you don't think I can".
Ever since I backed off helping at home (doing laundry, cooking dinner, etc... and waiting for her to do it, then thanking her and showing my appreciation to her for doing those things, my W's attitude is much better. In my mind she has a much better feeling about herself - she feels appreciated and worthwhile.
Of couse get involved in the finances - lots of things you can do behind the scenes without taking it over. But make sure she feels she is contributing to your home. Make her feel appreciated for the little things.
