Anything I say she will throw back in my face or redirect to something else I did.
my wife too. woo hoo,
the best success i had with mine was to no longer say or do anything. she got so pestered by that behavior, it must have been the fact that i was no longer taking the relationship temperature, if that is the correct phrase, that she started bringing it up. It was by that time that I had the WAS attitude. And I listened, did nt really feel I needed to validate anything, and was able to respond with you are right this isnt working out. Subsequent conversations, I used the phrases, I love you but I'm not in love with you, and, It's not you, It's me I have not been happy in this relationship for along time, i'm not looking to be in love with anyone right now just myself. By that time, I had developed some new friendships that must have given her the impression that ol' steve had let go and someone was going to snatch him up quick.
WOW, that attitude and that behavior had more of an effect than I could have imagined. Now, my wife she just got strange over the years, got into buddism, witchcraft, hanging out with some weird friends and on top of that started getting really mean towards me and my daughter. She would hang out all night with her friends and when she was home some nights lock herself in her room and chant some weirdo nonsense. I was Mister Nice Guy all around, I had let her take as much time as she needed to "find herself" until it started to seriously effect our homelife.
It was the turning the tables and imposing "limboland" on her that I think had her thinking about what is going on. I had nothing to say about the relationship. In my mind there really isnt one. I took no direction to try to work on the relationship; what for, this is a time to work on myself. I had realize I had been let down, my needs werent being met, and I had tried everything and she just didnt get it that i just shut down and wanted out.
