My instincts tell me it is likely flirtatious email exchanges which is giving them both a little excitement and a boost to their egos. However, my wife continues to state it is just a friendship and there is nothing inappropriate....however, I believe that her going to an ex boyfriend to talk about our M issues is inappropriate, particularly because they had not seen each other in 20 years and are virtual strangers.
But my focusing on this seems to distract from more pressing issues. We have general trust issues which she generally dismisses as me being hyper-sensitive. But since she is the one who is questioning whether or not we are going to make it and gave me the I don't love you like one should love their spouse has heightened my sensitivity.
I am trying to figure out if I take a hard line (e.g., I am discontinuing MC until she stops communication) or as advised by our MC and consistent with DB principles that I need to just give her the space to play out whatever it is she is doing, focus on myself, and let her go.
Any thoughts/ feedback would be appreciated. Thanks!
