Gotta Keep Trying 2

[Gardener]

Good verses from Gardener's thread. Already highlighted in my Bible.

Thanks for everyones' advice and support today. I needed both.

To which may I add Jeremiah 29:11, my friend.

[givingitmyall]

Good verses from Gardener's thread. Already highlighted in my Bible.

Thanks for everyones' advice and support today. I needed both.

To which may I add Jeremiah 29:11, my friend.

Thank you Gardener. I needed that.

[Butterfly1]

Jeez, GIMA, I was so wrapped up in my own sitch this week, I was MIA from my usual friends. I'm shocked at your news. I am with you - I believe my H is done too, although he has not 100% said so. So I understand your sadness about your children. This is my greatest sorrow too.

I'm with you - I'm so sorry. Time to move ahead with you. Time will heal this. You're not alone.

[robx]

I think I've been knocked to the canvas. Trying to decide if I want to get up or not.

Trying to decide if you want to get up or not?

Who said you had a choice?

I didn't hear no bell?

Get up you lazy bum!

You will get up!

I don't care about marriage reconciliation or not,
you will get up for your sake and for the sake of your children!
You will set an example for them that you don't fall down and assume the fetal position when life throws you a knockout punch - you get up off your ass and you start throwing some !@#$% punches back!

You're a man, a good one, set an example for your kids on what that means!

(rocky movie soundtrack plays in the background)

"Get up you son of a b!#$%, because Mickey luvs ya!"

[givingitmyall]

Rob,

No doubt I'm going to fight for me and the kids. What I was referring to was whether to keep fighting for the M, if I even have been before. Trying to decide if I'm just done with her.

[givingitmyall]

I couldn't make myself go to church with W and kids this am. I wanted to for the kids, but not with W. For me, the right thing this am was not to go.

I noticed this morning at breakfast (I did eat with W and the kids) that W is still wearing her wedding band. She has to have noticed I stopped wearing mine Friday. A bit surprised by that.

Even though I did not go to church, I read my Bible this morning and looked at some articles on D. I found this one on Dr. Charles Dobson's site (sorry for the non-religious, but there is some usefule information in there for you as well):

Divorce: Is It The Answer?

I plan to run a few errands this morning. I will take off just before W gets home. I will pick up a very vanilla anniversary card (tomorrow is anniv) and leave it for her just before leaving for work. I don't plan on writing much, if anything, in it. But, I don't want her to think I forgot.

I will then hit the gym for a workout.

S has a baseball game this afternoon, so I will have to put on my happy face and play like all is well to the outside world. I know, I don't have to be her friend. Just be there for the kids.

[robx]

I couldn't make myself go to church with W and kids this am. I wanted to for the kids, but not with W. For me, the right thing this am was not to go.

I noticed this morning at breakfast (I did eat with W and the kids) that W is still wearing her wedding band. She has to have noticed I stopped wearing mine Friday. A bit surprised by that.

Even though I did not go to church, I read my Bible this morning and looked at some articles on D. I found this one on Dr. Charles Dobson's site (sorry for the non-religious, but there is some usefule information in there for you as well):

Divorce: Is It The Answer?

I plan to run a few errands this morning. I will take off just before W gets home. I will pick up a very vanilla anniversary card (tomorrow is anniv) and leave it for her just before leaving for work. I don't plan on writing much, if anything, in it. But, I don't want her to think I forgot.

I will then hit the gym for a workout.

S has a baseball game this afternoon, so I will have to put on my happy face and play like all is well to the outside world. I know, I don't have to be her friend. Just be there for the kids.

you're still doing what you would have done, why?

No card.

Yes you've forgotten.

She attributes little to no value to this marriage.

You keep attributing value to it.

You're pursuing her, she isn't pursuing you.

Appear to move on, it is making you a bad person or unthoughtful for not getting a card.

Don't do it, just my 0.02 cents.

[Gardener]

Divorce: Is It The Answer?

Good article Gima, thanks. And as far as today goes, give most of it to you, which it sounds like you already are. And we all know Church isn't a building, You'll be in "church" and worshipping today, I'm sure.

[givingitmyall]

Rob,

I am listening. And I have not decided what to do about the card. I agree with you that she does not place any value on the R at this point. Maybe that changes, maybe not. I know I can't make her change.

[Gardener]

Gima, it will be real hard for you (simple, but hard), but I agree with Rob.
No card. That will be a strong message ("what is there to acknowledge, after all?") especially coupled with removal of your wedding ring.

And a big, serious 180 which I think you could use right about now.

Sorry to be blunt, but at this point, Anniversary Card = Doormat

Take it from me. Read my post last night about my trip to Stepdaughter's to see new Granddaughter. I bought flowers all around even for my wife and felt like such a schmuck as in "I did it again! When will I learn?!