One thing I have, a gift is my intuition and my drive. I like being the underdog.
I think the gift I need to find is SELF RELIANCE, I always counted on someone to help me.
For some reason Friday I think, my gut changed to she may not be done...Now there is one thing I know, nothing happens without a reason and she may go ahead and do her deal, she did get upset and short with my dad today when he asked her if she was leaving the door open for relationships..."what do you mean by that!" She said curtly. But he did tell her about imagine a sonic boom, you are not just affecting yourself, your kids and extended family. Now my dad's had enough with her, neighbors have had enough with her.
I HAVEN'T.
Everyone thinks I'm dealing with a WAS, screw 'em. She was never happy they say and it wasn't you why she wasn't happy she knows you put her first, etc. Done talking about it with them. I want shared custody, I'm pushing for that, I really think the key to this IS ME and my love for my kids and of course for her. She and I are currently growing in two different directions.
I can deal with the other, because the other that she does or doesn't do that's her not me and I've been nice and more importantly I kept my word, I told her 19 yrs ago, "I will never leave you." She gave her word and broke it.
For some reason today vs other days I'd think about the past and cry, today, well I just smiled and said yep that was fun.
God wants me to find myself and obviously her too. I missed signals two yrs ago,she asked to go to M cnslg and dropped it, now I know A WOMAN IS ALWAYS LOOKING TO MAKE A RELATIONSHIP BETTER, but they have to let go of the past. If given the opportunity with her or someone else I know what to look for.
Besides this is most important to me, it is too easy to quit and give up.
