Jak, Aud, Matilda, and Piecing Friends,
My W continues to be a pleasant person to be around lately. She seems to be intentional in trying to manage her moods, and choosing her words more carefully. Our weekly ritual is to watch Dancing with the Stars together. She has been more involved in the weekly cooking job. She has been more accepting of the dog, and clearly is concerned about his welfare, though prefers that I be the contact person for him at daycare and the vet.

I was planning on accompanying her to her dance venue last night, but she has what sounds like bronchitis. She found an orange juice machine in the basement, and has been drinking fresh squeezed orange juice regularly. I'm trying to work on my judgmental thoughts I have of her smoking. Even smokers deserve to be loved.

I continue to attend the neighborhood Quaker church weekly and enjoy trying to make sense of God. I haven't been in a Christian church since I lived at home, so I'm reqcquainting myself with Christianity. I've decided to start with God as love, and let my practices work on trying to connect with God/love, not worry about not understanding the mystery of God, but focus more on experiencing his presence.

My back flares-up periodically, but seems to be slowly getting better. The Pilates and chiropractic are helpful. I've started doing 20 minutes of stretching and Pilates exercises before work daily. This has reduced the intensity of the flare-ups to a dull ache in the buttocks versus shooting pain, where I'm unable to sit.

I'm reading If Grace is True: Why God Will Save Every Person by Phillip Gulley, a Quaker minister. He believes that everyone has the potential to experience the presence of God (salvation)and his grace (love), regardless of background, past mistakes, sexual orientation, and other. It prompted me to think, that even my WAS, who likely committed infidelity, deserves God's love. If God can love my W, than I should follow his example, regardless of past deeds and current imperfections.

CL

CL 53 W 54
M 20 yrs.
03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL
10-14' Piecing

"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."

----Tao Te Ching