We continued to live together for 16 months, until I helped her get her own place. During this period, and a couple years prior to the bomb drop, she was drinking heavily and going out 2, 3, and 4 nights a week to party with a single girlfriend. After her bomb drop, she began to spend the night away from home on those nights.
She moved out in April of 2003, and in July, told me of an affair that she'd been having. I went dark after that, and started to move myself forward and away from her altogether. In late August, I met and started seeing another woman, and had a really nice relationship with her for 6 weeks. My WAW knew about this, because two of the kids had met the new woman.
During the entire time that we were separated, WAW was drinking and smoking pot constantly. According to my oldest son's account years later, she was a trainwreck, as was her OM.
In Oct of 2003, she called me, crying uncontrollably and begging me to come back. I welcomed her back without hesitation, but she continued to drink heavily, so I told her that I couldn't have that. She moved back into her own place until Feb of 2004.
When she first moved back, she went through the typical post-affair depression for about 3-4 months. After that period, she began to put the house back in order and make it "hers" again.
Somewhere in the next months, she began to drink heavily again, and continued that pattern up until Feb of 2007, when she got her second DUI (3rd degree, no less). During this period of heavy drinking, she would be staggering over the stove when I got home from work, and would immediately pass out on the couch as soon as dinner was finished.
When she went sober, she first went to intensive therapy for the first few months, along with weekly AA meetings. After the therapy ended, she focused more on AA, and began to attend multiple meetings and social gatherings with that group, eventually to the point where she was gone 3-4 nights/week, just like before when she was drinking heavily.
Once again as well, her best friend and the person that she hung out with constantly was a single girlfriend, though this time, it was a sober relationship.
This summer, she FINALLY started to make efforts towards rebuilding OUR relationship, for the first time in years. By early Sept., we were getting along better than we had in years, and we were quite clearly on the path to full recovery as a couple.
Very suddenly and without any warning whatsoever, she pulled the plug on that and dropped another bomb on 9/25. By 10/9, she'd moved out. She had already lined up a free place to live by the time she dropped her bomb, so moving out was painless and the obvious solution for her.
I have suspected since her second bomb drop that she's interested in someone else, though I cannot prove that, except from circumstantial evidence. Mysterious phone calls that caused her to run down the hall to get behind closed door, the frequent nights out, clutching the cell phone like it's a life support system, erasing call history every night before she went to sleep, and, of course, the bomb drop itself.
My feeling about this right at this point, in light of her most recent 180, is that this relationship either never existed, or it's already blown apart...perhaps, he's married and refuses to leave his wife. I have no idea at this point. I'm still running with the assumption that there IS another OM, but that may be just a figment of my imagination. Time will tell, I guess.
