Is this the end of my marriage?

[P17]

P,
Don't come on here after all you post and shovel me crap that you're not investing way too much thought in anything your W is saying or doing. Puhleeeeze, you know and I know that you are.

Okay, I probably still am. Trying not to but I probably still am.

It's difficult when some of the things are said with such venom I wonder, what the hell have I done (I know the answer to that though - nothing but in her eyes everything so that she can justify to herself and others as to why I FORCED her to leave and be with other men).

That said, I don't know how the legal system is 'across the pond', but, here, there really isn't a dang thing you can do about your D's exposure to other OM unless it's an imeditate threat, be emotionally or physically.

As she is not my W's daughter I can. He is a 44 year old who worked for a supermarket. Drinks, smokes and like a laugh are his interests. His Facebook page suggests he smokes pot and he abandoned his two children (who my W claimed he hadn't seen in 6 years - there could be legitimate reasons for that). He's not a good role model, is nothing to my D and will only confuse her further if she is introduced to him. On top of all that neither I nor my D's mother know him and even my W has only been living with him 3 weeks. Finally, my D doesn't want to meet him.

Now, I'm a bit confused here. Why the hell should your W have any control over a "step child" on you? That's YOUR kid.

What I tried to do is facilitate contact between my W and my D as my D wanted to see her. I was just trying to be a good dad to be honest and this was before the texts from yesterday about her meeting the OM. My W would come here and spend time with my D and me. To stop my W thinking I was controlling her through contact and also so contact would be limited (ie. no, can I come over type of things) with my D I asked her for some dates when she would see her - that way everybody knew when and where it was all happening. She gave me dates to the end of Nov, I agreed them it was sorted. No controlling at all. In fact, as I said I did it to AVOID controlling!

So I don't understand where your W gets off calling the shots there.

From something I read today about people who are Obsessive Lovers (I think it was that), which my W is, is that they rarely have control over their situation so they desperately try and find control over any situation. I think that may be my W's reasoning. She knows that if my D wants to have contact with her I will do what I have to do make sure my D is happy (within reason). This has however gone too far and I think she underestimates me.

You're concerned about OM being exposed to your D? Man up, yet again. The only word of wisdom I think I EVER conveyed to my XW was: "If you're going to be with him, fine, not around the kids". Well, since she up and left and moved directly in with him, that 'request' went straight down the lou.

At least because my D is not my W's D, I can control that and say 'no more'.

So, pull those belts tight and get ready for the ride. It seems you are fighting the power now of 2 women here. And why they'd gather in numbers against you like this is a bit questionalbe.

I think it's actually a power battle. My D's mother wants to make sure she is important in my life so if she holds the power over my W she's higher up the pecking tree. I now have her onside however after I told her what my W really thinks of her. My W is desperately trying to hurt me by sticking two fingers up and saying she doesn't need me anymore to see my D as she would see her through my D's mother. W's clingyness to my D's mother was obvious for me to see in the texts bearing in mind how much she hates her.

Thus, are you SURE there isn't something you aren't telling us? I think there is a major piece of the puzzle missing here.

I've told you guys everything I can think of. I genuinely haven't tried to deceive anybody.

When you say there is a major piece of the puzzle missing - I say that to myself everyday. Things don't just add up.

Question for you - is you XW still with the original OM?