Got off work a bit early today, so I called to talk to the kids. Talked to the W a little too. She's really sick, doctor says she has the swine flu. I said "Wow, I sure picked a lousy week to go out of town!" In her new kind positive way she replies, sounding like death warmed over, "We're doing just fine, don't worry about us." She's so great like that now, so different than how she used to be. We chit chatted about a couple other things, then I said I had to go meet the guys for dinner. She lingered on the phone for another minute or two, then she said her throat hurts to talk so we said our goodbyes.
You know, I've been thinking about this. What do I miss about my W? I don't in any way miss many of the ways our M was. We were resentful toward each other. We had walls up everywhere. Every little issue between us just caused us to collapse in defeat one more little bit. My W herself was selfish, self absorbed, she showed me almost no appreciation and no affection. We were good together in some ways though. We shared some interests, like football, and we loved movies, and we love our kids. We genuinely like each other too. I think she is a great combination of intellect, humor, and fun. I always looked forward to getting her opinion on things I was going through at work, or on politics, or world affairs.
But really, what I've come to realize, is the biggest reason I want to be together with my W is because of who she is now. It's like all her best attributes have been amplified many times, and her bad attributes have significantly shrunk, or disappeared altogether. In many ways I feel like I'm courting someone entirely new, and I really like her. This gives me great hope that we can have a new, much better M.
