That was such a clear and thoughtful response. Thank you.
Ok so where do you start?
First, the time must come for you to let go of the past. The old marriage is gone. It is dead. It sounds like you had some wonderful memories, keep those, and find your way to accept that that was then…
Next, stop talking to friends and family about this. They want you to not hurt. And they will not understand if, down the road, you two do get back together. Especially if you keep telling them all of the things he has done and you keep crying and moping about it. They will want you to move on, definitely with some one else, who has not done that to you. Come and talk and vent here. Find a counselor, be it therapist or religious person, if that is what you think might help you.
Ok so you never wanted a D, but you got one. You had your reasons and right now that is the position you are in. A part of life and there really is no need to explain it any further than you have. IMO.
Also IMO, I don’t know if you are ready to answer the what kind of person would want this anymore questions. The simple fact is, at this point in your journey, it is what you want, even you fight it tooth and nail. Accept it.
Then start looking in the mirror.
Keep contact with XH to kids stuff right now. It is probably the best thing for you, to keep you less confused and not worrying so much about what he is doing.
At the moment, you really, really, really need to put your focus on you and your kids. Let your XH blow in the breeze and go whichever way he is going. Right now it is the best thing for you both.
Time is always on our side.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
