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I would let your lawyer know about your conversation with the teachers. Get copies of the grade sheet that has been going to his house. That should be powerful ammo against his weekday custody pleas. Good job on not disparaging him to the teachers. If need be, at least they can document your concern and his lack of participation. Our high school usually does a one night come visit the teachers night. Check with the school. You can meet with each teacher but have to stand in line with the other parents. It makes for a long night and sometimes you can't get in to everyone so start with the really important ones if that's what your school does.

Speaking of school. I thought the plan was to reassess how public school is working before the hearing. I would say it's not working that well given his lack of communication and support for classroom work.

Don't respond to the job email. You and your L know that you're working on employment. It wouldn't hurt to document where you've applied and interviewed though in case you need it later.

Hope your D is feeling better!


previous thread: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...903#Post1983903
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karen43 Offline OP
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Originally Posted By: bluestar

Speaking of school. I thought the plan was to reassess how public school is working before the hearing. I would say it's not working that well given his lack of communication and support for classroom work.

Don't respond to the job email. You and your L know that you're working on employment. It wouldn't hurt to document where you've applied and interviewed though in case you need it later.

Hope your D is feeling better!
She is. I think it might be a stress thing b/c she seems totally healthy to me. She said she feels fine after she throws up. Maybe X rushes her around or something, she likes to move at a slow pace, just her natural pace.

I am thinking I would like to have custody of her for most of the school week whether we hs or public school. D9 is enjoying it right now, although I think that might change later down the road in middle or high school. The truth is X is a busy L.

I talked to the math/science teacher today while she got together the math homeworks for D9. She said don't worry about the grades, b/c she's going to change them to what she wants??? I think this is due to D9's total sweetness and major hardworking. She told me today D9 will work on stuff all day super hard.

I love your ideas for email response back to X, kat yours too, but I'm thinking no reply for 2 reasons: first, I think whatever I email him will be used in court. Wdid, I LOVE your response, but I think that would be like waving a red flag in front of a bull(y). Also, from a non-legal standpoint, I think it prob. irritates him when I don't reply (which I have stopped doing unless it's a direct question re: the kids). smile

Oh, and I have been documenting so I have about 100 jobs I've interviewed for now at this point and kept record of all of them. So I don't think his gas station offer will make any impact on anything.

Last edited by karen43; 10/22/09 09:32 PM.

Me 53
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yeah, probably best to not respond......he really pushes my buttons....you are doing well to not let him push yours.

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Thanks for the chat last night. I appreciated it a bunch.

kat


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No problem. I chatted just as much! Always good to talk to you. I'm so glad I was able to return the favor b/c lately it was you cheering me up last couple of calls!

Had fun observing the toddler program in GA today. Got back to email from X. I had forwarded him an email re: social skills training for autism kids tomorrow night for S15. He emailed back:
would like to do it but given your refusal to exchange the kids in a agreed upon manner on Tuesday night i will be unable to attend the training.

I prob. shouldn't have bothered, but I emailed him back suggesting he take S15 to the training and I would take D9 to the afterschool/volunteer stuff from 3 to 6. But since the training is at 6, he prob. can't/won't do it b/c he wouldn't be able to pick D9 up. I assume his L instructed him he has to set a precedent of having the kids Tues. night or something like that b/c of $$$.

I've also saved my email (and his) for L, b/c I think it shows he's not at all concerned with the kids best interests if he refuses to cooperate at all which I expect. Would love to be proved wrong though.

I hope I can have less contact with him after the D. I wish for many reasons that I could get them most of the school week, so I wouldn't have to deal with him even via email.



Last edited by karen43; 10/26/09 06:19 PM.

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Email wars again with X re: tuesday. I'm not going to email anymore just gets him more worked up, maybe tomorrow.

D9's teacher suggested I ask X to leave D9's papers in the folder and leave in the pack for me to look at. He emails me back, he'll make me copies of them and drop them off personally to me when I drop off the kids Tuesday night. I emailed back I like the teacher's suggestion, then no need to see each other tomorrow. smile


Me 53
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My goodness, THIS madness, I do not miss, and am really sort of glad XW doesn't have e-mail in her cave. crazy


Me 35/XW 33
S13 & S12
M: 10/17/98
OM & S: 07/08
D final 06/09/09
12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing"
06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10
06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
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My xh doesn't have email either which I'm thankful for. Not so much from his end, but from mine. I'm afraid I'd be firing off stuff to him that I couldn't retract. smile

Karen, you are handling your x as well as can be expected given his erratic, volitile behavior. I just wish you had some witnesses to his crazy a$$ behavior!


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

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Doesn't this lawyer husband of yours know that blackmail is a crime?? Save that e-mail.

kat


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Hey, folks, e-mail is a godsend compared to talking verbally with these batchit crazy people.


Me: 49
WAW: 47
S11, S7
Years Married/Together: 17/18
Bomb: 6/15/07
Separation: 7/6/07
D: 4/3/09

Real love is a decision.
Marriage is a commitment.
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