Over the Shock and GALing 6

[Thinker]

I agree with your philosophical wanderings here. I see both the pro's and cons of separation from the kids point of view.

Honestly, though, there is another consideration. Me. I look at my kids and I don't want to separate from them. I don't want to miss half of their weekends and half of their birthdays and half of the holidays etc.

But what about the elusive Middle Ground or Third Way? Is there an intermediate stage for the Thinkers? Separation? Or is that too cost-prohibitive?

Unfortunately, we live in an expensive (but not large or luxurious) house in an expensive area of the country. I have the only real income. Mrs. T works hard at a low paying, but rewarding, part time job in the evenings, and is trying to start a business which takes even more of her time and pays nothing. My income currently pays just enough to pay our mortgage and expenses. Even while receiving a fair alimony from me, she would not be able to afford to either maintain our current house, or rent a house nearby that is big enough for the kids.

The only financially feasible separation would mean me moving to a small inexpensive apartment while she stays in the house with the kids - not a situation I want to be in.

To create a separation realistically simulates the conditions of D, we would have to sell our house.