With respect to a strategy for having a conversation with your W about your current sitch.......I would suggest an approach that was suggested to me a few times and makes good sense here. You can casually initiate a conversation but using general, non-specific, non-provocative terms.....then let your W fill in the blanks. If she is conversant, and from your posts it sounds as though she is, she will give you information. LISTEN and let HER talk. As a litigator you should be quite skilled at this, but maybe it's not so easy for you to do it in a way that your W wouldn't pick up on??????
Jody suggests talking about sensitive issues while you are moving around within a space (e.g. cooking) so the other person can't see your face as easily and the interaction isn't as threatening because it is not perceived as having such importance.
