Originally Posted By: tristan
I did ask W about OM last night.

M: "I need to ask. Is OM respecting your wishes?"
W: "No. Not really. He had K contact me and ask for a book back I had borrowed. He said he wanted to meet for 'closure'. At first I agreed, but then realized it was a bad idea and e-mailed him that it was best if we did not see each other."
M: "Is it harasment?"
W: "No. He is just hurting. Why do you ask?"
M: "I was thinking and its just that the 'I hate you statement' is concerning."
W: "I think he was just angry."
M: "Well. I know you know what is best."
...

I found this conversation uncomfortable. I think it was more uncomfortable for me than her. Anyway, I think she has a good guage on it and trust she will let me know if she thinks it is getting out of hand.



Tristan,

It's VERY good that she was honest with you, and you need to get in the habit of saying "Thank you for being honest with me." You handled it with grace, and so did she. The "closure" line is classic wayward fogbabble, as you know, and it's VERY good that she caught herself on that. The only thing she should have done better/differently was to have a THIRD PARTY convey that "Mrs. Tristan is working on her marriage, and wants no contact with you. She asks that you respect her wishes. She did want to return your book, however, and wishes you well."

Is there a trusted person she can use as just such a third party?

Puppy