She sure has a strange way of showing "done"-ness.
She sure does. She called again this morning and asked if she could talk to me for a minute. Sure, what is it? Did you take that woman off you FB? No. Why not? I said, it's like this, she's a friend and that's all there is to it. You're not going to dictate who I'm going to be friends with. She said, I don't have a problem with you being friends with anybody else, just her. I asked, why that was. She said, I think there's something going on between you two. I assured her that there was not, just friends. She lives in another state, how much contact do you really think there is? She said, I'm not going to be able to get past this. She said, I won't be romantically involved with you if she doesn't come off your FB and I go on. I said, ok, I guess I'll talk to you later and hung up.
OH GOOD LORD, John. Do you even LISTEN to yourself?? This was all unnecessary.
Not only should you have started off with:
Her: Can I talk to you for a minute?
You: I'm sorry, but I was just out the door on my way to do something. I'll have to catch up with you later. Bye!
But if you DID engage her, you should have:
Her: Did you take that woman off of FB?
You: I don't think so; why?
Her: Why not?
You: Because I didn't want to.
Her: I don't have a problem with you being friends with anybody else, just her:
You: I'm sorry you feel that way. Look, I was just on my way out the door, was there anything else?
etc.
SHE NO LONGER DESERVES YOUR JUSTIFICATIONS OR RESPONSES, JOHN. She is "done," remember? Her rights to wife-ness ended when she fled your marriage and screwed around with other men.
Have you learned NOTHING from the thousands of posts that people have given you on here???
Yeah, it's great that your WORDS said "You're not going to dictate who I'm going to be friends with," but your ACTIONS -- answering the phone, engaging with her, and then gracing her with answers and justifications to her petty little controlling fears and tactics -- your ACTIONS say otherwise. Your ACTIONS say "You're still my wife, you DO still get to dictate things to me, but I'm just ANNOYED by it now. But I'm still thinking about it."
