Well, to sum it all up, you all were right and I was wrong. Just reminds me of my need to come on here and get advice.
The conversation went something like this:
"I have something to tell you before we go and watch TV."
He looks at me. "That guy that I was seeing called me and sent me an email. I wanted you to know so that you would know that I wasn't hiding anything from you."
He lays down, looks at me and smiles (!!!!!yes, smiles!!!!). I say, "I was caught off guard with the phone call, and he talked fast and got off the line fast. I didn't respond to the email."
He says, "He was putting his feelers out. He said what he did in hopes you would stop him." I said, "I told him that I was happy and doing well."
He asks, "When was this?"
I answer, "Honestly, it was awhile ago, I'm not sure exactly when, and I was considering not telling you."
"Why?" he said.
"Because I was afraid this would mess with your head even more than now and that would just put us back even more with sex and everything."
He said, "No, what's in my head about him will just always be there, this isn't going to do anything. I want you to tell me. Hiding it is a "red flag". You telling me is a trust thing." (Yeah, yeah, what you guys all said!)
"I'm glad I told you."
"Me, too."
"I also remembered how you told me that your family used to shelter you from things because they thought you couldn't handle it and how you used to hate that."
"Yeah. Thank you," and he hugs me.
"I think I know how he got my email. He is now working at (the place 3 blocks away), and I used to go there so he probably found my email in the records."
"Nice." (sarcasm)
"Well, that or he just figured it out because it was my name. Do you want me to change my email or my phone?"
He immediately says, "No, no. If it becomes a problem, then we can do more, but just leave it alone."
"OK"
We talk a little more. I asked if he keeps things inside because he is afraid of hurting ME. He says no, but that sometimes he still gets mad at me. I said you must not forgive me all of the way yet. He said that it is more that he is angry that he got me to that place. I again told him that I made the choice so I'm at fault. Then he says the only thing he sometimes wants to know is what this guy looked like. I told him that he is not attractive, and that he is way more attractive than this guy (absolutely true). He says how that just goes to show that I was lacking so much in what I needed that I was looking for ANYBODY to help fill me up and he feels so bad about that.
I said, "I can't believe he works only 3 blocks away."
He said, "He can live right next door for all I care. I'm not thinking about him and it doesn't matter." (!!!!!!)
I say, "You are awesome."
"YOU are awesome."
Then, he leans over and gives me a passionate kiss and I LIKED it!
