So, today has been pretty good. Spent most of the day out of the office and being out and about with my sick, lame and lazy clients!! It was good to be in the sunshine at 29 degrees on this beautiful Spring day.
Was at an appointment near H's place and stopped for some lunch as I had time. Realising how close I was, I sent a text to H to ask if he wanted me to drop in a card of his that I am holding. Told him:
Me: I'm in the neighbourhood and haven't got much time but could drop your card in H: No, all good, I'll pick it up at the weekend if that's OK - busy with clients right now anyhow Me: Just a thought that was all - didn't mean to impose! (GREAT - confirmation that he's no longer thinking about coming down but actually IS coming) H: Weekend is fine, thanks. Me: OK - please let me know what day best suits.
...and then I don't know why but I added "I saw that horrid crash on the freeway last night - two men were killed". It was almost like I wanted to say "life's too short for all this" but knew that it wasn't the time or the place. It is, however, a big fear for me. What if .... I need not complete the sentence for all of those who fear, like me, that they may never have the chance to say "goodbye" at the appropriate time.
... On to less macabre things, I came home and set to play with God's little joke for the LBS ... WEEDS!!!!!!! I'm sure that they were sent to give us something meaningful to do with our time. Why am I always out there wrestling with the little blighters?!!
Anyhow, had mentioned to H on Monday that I would get them all out before he comes along at the weekend with the sheep sh*t and then the beds will be ready to receive said smelly stuff!! Garden all weeded as well as the beds ... looks good - H should be well impressed but overall, I got a sense of achievement and stood back when finished and said to the Universe - as it is my new bezzy friend - "this is for me. I am proud of my home and I am proud of my garden. I am suffering with an aching lower back now and in the morning I know that my fingers will ache too, but I have achieved and will continue to do so. I can put on a front that all is well in my life. No-one outside needs to see the pain inside - and that includes H. My store front is pristine and everything is neat and orderly. I am portraying confidence and that my life is in order. I am content .... but will be even more so at the weekend when I see my H"!!!!!!!
I'm such a sook but it's killed off another evening and I am happy-ish. And so to bed.
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
