Thanks Clueless for the Bday wishes. It was a great day bc I was able to spend my afternoon with my Ds and my mom. They are definitely the unconditional loving ladies in my world. A fantastic day for sure.
Gardener, I agree, I am probably putting too much emphasis on how the X acts. Although it does mean a lot to me. I need to take care of myself first and not be swayed by how she may be after today.
The X did text me after I picked up D and ask me to bring a jacket of my D’s from my house. I did not respond. I really didn’t even see the text till later and I did not return home anyway. I told her earlier I would bring my D back around 8:30ish. We got wrapped up a little earlier than anticipated and mom wanted to get home so, I made it back to X’s house by eight. She wasn’t home and the D did not really want to get out – she wanted to stay with Dad. So we rode down to the Target and browsed for a little more. Went back at 8:30 and the X was still not there. We went up rang the doorbell and no answer. Figured no one was home and maybe she would be back any minute knowing we were supposed to be there at that time. Waited for about 10 – 15 minutes no one showed up. Starting to get a little cool outside and the neighborhood is not the best. Rang the doorbell again and the X’s mom came to the door. She was in a pleasant mood and was trying to be cordial. She said my X told her it was my BDay and said happy Bday. Wow again. I just said thanks and acted nice back.
Anyway, I am excited X and her mom were able to acknowledge and say H BDay, but I am a little miffed at the X not being at home when I have to return my D. Like you said G man, don’t let them dictate my actions. They will more than likely let us down every time.
The X's mom asked me about the jacket as well when I dropped off my D. Explained to her that we did not return to my house so I did not have it.
I texted my X back and told her the same and that I would drop it off either to or from my way to work. She texted back and say "Ok. Thanks". Again, at least she is not in the verbal abuse attack mode.
Another busy day. Later this evening I called the X to check on the D. I also let her know I was going to drop off D's jacket tomorrow if ok and she said it was. D did not care to talk as usual, but the X was a little more talkative and still in a nice phase. I also advised her that I ordered another halloween costume bc the other one was a little small so had to go online to get larger one. Hope it will be here in time (crossing the fingers). It said guarenteed delivery by Oct 30. Talk about cutting it close.
In the meantime, I am continuing my journey to a healthier me, but do hope the X will maintain her journey also. Outward appearances seem she is going in the right direction at the least. Send up the prayers!!!
In the meantime, I am continuing my journey to a healthier me, but do hope the X will maintain her journey also. Outward appearances seem she is going in the right direction at the least. Send up the prayers!!!
I will keep praying for you. It sounds like there MIGHT be good signs with your sitch.
You can detach and maintain hope she will come around. They aren't mutually exclusive. But having hope she will come around is NOT expecting she will.
U are correct that I can't let the X's attitude dictate my attitude. The other day we were able to talk with a feeling of mutual respect. Today I call and you can sense the immediate defensiveness and discontent in the X's voice.
Example.. I call, she answers, I say "hey". She says "yeah?" and it goes from there. It is like I have bothered her and disrupted her time. I just needed to confirm she did get a jacket I left in her mailbox for my daughter and that I will pick up my D tomorrow afternoon.
The WASs have much to work out in their world. Tomorrow is a new day...
Still working on myself. Wishing the X would work on herself. Holidays coming up. Halloween just around the corner. Hate it for my D and all of us. Sending up the prayers for the X and our family / situation...
Kind of lonely out here.. try not to have any other females around my D. In between times I have her and my working schedule not too much time left. How nice it would be to have an SO to share some these times with..
So I broke down and called the X today. Told her we were just checking in with her (my D and I). Talked about D and told her what she was doing and all.
X and I talked a little. Mostly me asking questions and her being distant. I asked X what she was doing, if she would like to go to a Halloween function at the zoo tonight. She said no. Asked her if she wanted to meet us for dinner, she says no. Asked her what was going on with her today. She says she is shopping. Asked her if she wanted to meet us out or go shopping with her. She says she didn't mind if we went shopping with her.
Took me a little while to get D and myself ready to go, but finally got out and met up with X. We shopped for about an hour and a half. We picked up another halloween outfit for my D and we were going to the halloween function tonight. I asked if I needed to get a candy bin for her to be able to collect the candy in. X says she had one and I could come by her house to pick it up on the way to the function.
We went by the house and surprise she got me out of the car. We were just going to wait in the car at first. We got out and I asked if she would mind changing her at her house since we were there already. She said she would and invited me in. They usually will not let me anywhere in the house, so I was somewhat shocked to say the least. The X's mother was home also. Because the X invited me in, my daughter (who is learning to talke very much) also invited me in and the X's mother even invited me in.
I was very ancy being in the house after all we have been through. I just kept kind of quiet and when the X finished changing my D, we got out of there. Scary!!!
Another thing that trips me out. When we were shopping together I told X we needed to hurry if we were going to stop by her house, bc I have to meet friends at a certain time at the halloween event.
She said "friends? Your new Girlfriend?" Why does she say that? Does she care? I just kind of said "nah. Just friends." She said she was kidding. But it does kind of hurt. Knowing I am really trying hard not to get close to other women knowing I have a D with her, wish to work things out and she acts like she does.. what is one think of that????
