No. DBing is not about 100% of the changes to save the marriage. It's about understanding the changes you want to make FOR YOU. Then if those changes help save the marriage, awesome.
The part of the 100% being on you is that yes, if you want to save the marriage you may have to "deal" with some crap in the beginning while the WAS figures some things out. But it does not mean only you change....eventually the WAS changes too or you're right, it won't work.
