Quote: There could be many explanations: It may well be that he feels more comfortable and relaxed when you are with him and does not feel 'obliged' to dress up...or maybe you only notice more when he is with you... or he might be even contrary and rebel to what he percives as an attempt to control him...
The first and last are true. Believe it or not, he does pay attention to what he wears. He's not a Don Juan or anything, but there are levels-sneakers, hiking boots, or nice black, skecher boots, jeans vs. dockers, hair gel or no?, cologne or no? shave or no? shave AND trim or no? The biggie is probably that it has turned into a control issue. (As many things have been in our r.)
Yes, I would feel better about myself if I dressed nicer. I shop at thrift stores, and a lot of times I can find nice tops, and long jeans, but not long trendy dress pants. So, if I have to spend some money on nice pants, it shouldn't be such a big deal.
I've been struggling $$-we keep our bills separate, and I brought up the idea of selling my truck and buying one of his cars. (he said we'd work something out.) I hate to feel "indebted" to him, guess we need to talk about that again. OC, part of me does not want to give up the truck, but...I kinda messed up. Shoulda kept the SUV, etc, etc. At least I don't think he is mad about it anymore.
OK, I'm rambling now. I will check out Chadwick's and Newport news, thanks! I think JcPenney has a tall section in their on-line catalog too. Maybe I should become a designer....
If Opt would have posted this, I would tell her that H IS coming around-it may not be as quickly as she likes, but there has been definite progress made!! He does love you, but is afraid/guarded from telling you right now. The more time goes on and goes well, the more he will open up and feel freer to put his heart back out there. There is a history of problems happening in public. Right now, he feels more comfy going to lower-key type places like local bars w/bands. Eventually, you two will be able to hit the club clubs, AND look great, AND have fun.
He wore nicer pants when we were dating. Don't know if he backed off b/c I wasn't?
I would like to dress up more. I would like to go out-out more, but there is this stupid f'in thing called the past! And if he doesn't feel comfy going out-out with me, there's no reason I can't go out-out with my friends. And look HOT. I thought I'd wear more skirts over the summer, but it rained a lot. Suppose I can buy some tights for the winter.
thanks all for stopping by! It's helping a lot. I'm feeling an overwhelming need to take care of me and kind of forget about him.
