LFA! It is so great to hear from you and I've been thinking about you too! What's the latest with you? It sounded like your H did file but was trying the disolution route? Sometimes it's hard to move on without the filing and being done with it, but the hardest thing I struggle with is to file vs not, because I don't want this, and yet it is in some ways I'm sure preventing me from fully moving on. Like a Catch-22!
Some days (more lately) I feel lonely again...but when I'm busy w my friends and work and just trying the think positively, i feel better. I did go on a date with one guy (well more of just a hook-up) and started developing a crush on him, which was a great distraction and confidence booster and changed my energy for the better. Made me actually think maybe there are other good guys out there that could even be a better fit for me than current H! But then this guy turns out to be a 'player' and not call me or want anything more, and i feel a bit the sting of rejection... I know it comes w the territory but still hurts as I go back 'out in the world', if you will.
And then sometimes I feel anxious about it like i really want to meet someone again...if it's not H then have that level of closeness w someone else. I get impatient sometimes. Like I want to short-circuit the process but I know it takes time and it may be awhile before I find someone again...and I need to heal fully first. Ugh. The process. I keep telling myself to trust the process...and continue GAL. But I also feel kind of sensitive too... I had a girlfriend lecture me the other day about how i need to take it slow with guys (hello, i've waiting 10 months!) and not rush into anything and kind of was getting all preachy with me, and i felt really judged and talked down to. It really upset me. Maybe I'm just uber-sensitive, and caught b/w missing/wanting H, and/or wanting new crush or distraction... oh well.
Yes I have lawyers names and will call to speak w one of these days soon. Just didn't want to have to pay fees and stuff yet. But I know i need to get around to it. Did you interview for free or did they charge you to educate you on basics even if you don't retain them? Advice on that front helpful as well.
Many thanks, and my prayers are with you! Hugs -hhh
