Hi, It's me... I'm doing ok emotionally, head hurts though. H & I are doing pretty well. He met me for dinner after work last night. I called him earlier and asked what he was doing very coolly-as if whatever he did didn't matter. (It actually didn't) and he seemed like he wanted to do dinner w/me! He was nice and talkative! ++!! However, he was very tired-we seem to be going back & forth-me one day, him the next. We talked about it and it seems like he has S.A.D. He is very much affected by the weather & the time change. It's just been rainy & cold & bleh...
I'm still having some bouts of anxiety and obsessing about him being attracted to other women. If anything, this was the FIRST thing that I ever went to get counseling for 15 years ago, and I still have the issues! I HATE feeling jealous. This is definitely learned behavior b/c my mom is always very jealous/competitive/feels threatened by other women. My dad told me last month that she would have jealous fits at parties and whatnot. Sound familiar? My stomach sank. (H was there.) But, I thought "This has got to stop!" At least even if I feel that way, act as if I don't. H has been very hurt and then angry that I didn't have more faith in him. Could I be projecting my feelings onto him?
Well, if anyone has any input, I would appreciate it! k
