FIB..I'm happy for K, things are looking up, lets not "piss on her strawberries" as we say in the UK. Noone said it wasnt going to be hard time ahead. But allowing yourself to love someone carries risks, just like surgery does, to use your analogy. To open yourself up, let someone into your soul (again) you risk getting hurt, but if you dont take that risk.. you wont get to experience the joy of love either. There are no gaurantees EVER. At some point, you just have to sign the consent form and let yourself be cut open and trust that its gonna be ok and you wont wake up with with your nuts missing instead of your appendix.
Ali....no one is denying Kalni's courage and desire to take a risk and explore whether her husband is HONEST and TRULY desiring to be back with her and STAY monogamous. My issue here is ...your posts are like flipping a light switch on at a surprise party...noisemakers, party poppers, etc.
YOU....WE....do NOT know the content of Kalni's H's heart. SHE NEEDS CAUTION RIGHT NOW and CAREFUL SUPPORT. Her husband has proven NOTHING yet except expressed a desire to be with Kalni. This does not happen overnight. A three year affair does NOT end simply by being caught.
I'm sorry...but I take responsibility here to my friend to balance excessive exuberance. IT IS VERY HARD WORK TO RE-ESTABLISH TRUST. We ALL KNOW that Kalni can do it. NONE OF US can be sure that her H can YET. And everyone is pushing sex. Crap. Does anyone here know if the OW has an STD? Is Kalni's H obligated now, as a sign of faith, to be tested for HPV, chlamydia and HIV? Many of these can be carried in the man and unknowingly transferred. Harsh questions, right Ali??? Who likes to talk about this, right? Well..it's fact.
So, yes Ali..if you call this pissing on her strawberries, label it as you will. I choose to call it ground-based support with cautious optimism for a sunny future.
Kalni....you know the deal. Be careful.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
