Antlers,
Originally Posted By: antlers
It seems like she has to maintain her anger and negative feelings in order to justify, or help her to take, the actions that she continues to take.

Exactly. A form of "script".

And, Antlers, it does get better. It does get easier. You can help it along and speed it up in so many ways that we both know and need not list here. But even if you don't help it along, it will still happen.
It will get easier. The pain will lessen. The pain will stop.

Gardener

"My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may call your own."
Cyrano deBergerac