Point taking Karen. And that is my thought exactly. Try giving him the key instead of acting as gatekeeper to his home, see if it works, and then decide from there. In a way, I also thought that even though it may seem like I'm giving him the "control" over the situation, in reality I'm still in control. I'm deciding to give him the power to handle this and to show what he's about. I did in fact think about this decision - it just that now I'm kinda concern about was this really right. I'[m also reading my book about boundaries so I'm like, Uhhhh was this the right way to set boundaries. In another way, this puts an end to a vicious cycle we kept going in - H saying I kicked him out and took his key, and me saying but you were disrespectful and didn't do the things to keep up going, and back and forth and back and forth. Now let me see what he does with this.
Btw, I'm not sure at all about his interaction with ow. It seems very limited. He does say he doesn't go there much and he just drops off stuff for son and picks him up. But not living together and him not being transparent, I'm not 100% certain. But I am able to get in touch with him and he spends quite an amount of time with people I know. The big thing is that he says that he decided to pull away, which is good instead of me insisting that he ends it. But again not sure and won't swear by it. But the feeling I get around him and his interaction seems more removed from ow. But still not quite certain.
