Hi, T2 made a really good point about going into the other room. I won't throw tomatoes at you. I really NEED the tough love!! and some 2x4's. I appreciate your dropping in.
I guess I don't know HOW to be close. My C is always harping on me to give him space and not be clingy, but where is the balance? I don't want to be totally not affectionate and closing him off.
Last night I came home and was really tired. (starting to get sick.) H finished band practice and sat on the couch with me. We asked about each other's days, he put his head back. I asked if he was tired and still felt sick and he said a little. Then he proceeded to lay back. I offered him my left over dinner-he hadn't eaten anything. I asked if he wanted to go to bed and he said yes. So, we went to bed and read, and went to sleep at 10. (early!) I just stroked his hair for a few min., and curled up to him and said i was sorry about our miscommunication at the bar. he said it was no big deal. Then we rolled to our own side.
Believe me, on the couch, many things were going through my head, like he's mad at me, he's miserable in this m., he blames me, he doesn't have fun with me, he doesn't want to be physical with me, etc...When is essence:HE WAS PROBABLY TIRED AND NOT FEELING WELL!!!
This morn we kissed and hugged good-bye and i told him ily. he said it back. Didn't talk about tonight. I'm not planning to go to vball since i don't feel well. I want to encourage him to go out with his friends tho if he wants to. It seemed to do so much for his mood. (BUT, i have to remember that he hasn't been feeling well for the past week and a half!!)
how do I DB if I don't feel good?? I guess I can still be in good spirits, no? Maybe if he stays home we could cook or order take-out and play games. My "as if" hat fell off a couple nights ago. I thought I found it, but it was crumpled.
I just keep crying (when he's not around) wondering if things are ever going to be alright and if there is a solution for my migraines.
