Kalni, I wish I knew. I can only give credit to PRAYER, because without God's grace, and His mercy, I don't think I COULD have handled it in my flesh.
The Bible says basically that God doesn't give us more than we can handle (I Cor. 10:13, among others). I honestly think He just sometimes "throws us a bone," in that He helps blot some of these things from the minds of those of us who are more sensitive and thin-skinned than others (and yeah, big bad-ol' Puppy is notoriously thin-skinned!).
It also helps to think of a cheating spouse as an ADDICT, which of course they are. Like with a smoker, it doesn't excuse the conscious decision to have those first few cigarettes, but it does explain the strong draw the affair has on them, and how it affects their state-of-mind and even personality. That really helped me find compassion.
