Last week was perfectly horrible, had to keep trying to justify my need for medical attention as if I were a dog, the outside dog, who we were trying to decide if it was really worth taking to the vet. I turned out to have a very bad infection, and lucky for me, I only had to pay my regular copay. So H, said oh, then you made the right decision (because of the copay). That all culminated in a gigantic fight because I didn't send invitations to my son's birthday party this past weekend, I called people instead. All of a sudden, sending invitations is the be all, end all of civilized life on this planet. It was too stupid to even go into.
THEN, we had a totally awesome weekend. We did a bunch of work on the house together, without acrimony, went to the kids' games, got everything ready for a big sleepover, had a big party, he got up and made everyone a big breakfast...we watched football the rest of the day. Just relaxed and pleasant and happy. The kids were super happy.
Looking back over the last couple of weeks...I think the pattern really is that even when things are going well, he starts feeling tension rising. He was feeling tension about having people over...the drip drip drip starts...fault finding over nonsensical things, passive aggressive remarks (what?? I was just joking...can't you take a joke?) Drip drip, pick, pick, until we have a fight. He was so relieved after this fight, I could see it. He needed it. I don't need it however.
He's done some good things though, he was great with the party. And he sent me a youtube song by email. He's never done that before. I've tried sending him songs or jokes or whatever, and he won't even open it. Says he doesn't have time.
But he did it, and it was really sweet and personal, about being there for someone. I gave him lots of praise for all the good stuff. I am glad it's Monday though, because he can be kind of exhausting, even when he's in a good mood.
