I continue to feel like your husband is RIPE for a pure DB approach, and you going darker and more mysterious, as I still don't think you've ever fully implemented it. And he's shown that he's still HIGHLY connected to you, and -- for lack of a better term -- responds to good ol' JEALOUSY, very predictably.
Quote:
Friday - Got a phone call from H around lunchtime asking if I wanted him to get the 4-wheeler all ready to go for my weekend plans. At this point, things had been cancelled for that part of my weekend and I didn't need the 4-wheeler, so I just explained that no, plans had changed and wouldn't need it.
MISSED OPPORTUNITY!
Better:
"No, but thank you. I'm fine."
Quote:
When I pulled up at home about an hour and half later, H was in driveway about to pull out. Backs up and rolls down window inquiring about the cancellation of my weekend plans. Just gave vague and brief explanation to which he got irritated and said "what's so secretive, why can't you just tell me what happened?" I said with friendly, nonchalant face "not secretive, I'm kinda bummed about it and just don't feel like explaining is all."
Closer. You created mystique (good), but you conveyed you were "bummed" (bad). Remember, you want to convey "Life is great! Never would've voluntarily chosen this path, but beginning to grow, and to like the view!"
Better: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be. Look, I really gotta go, cuz I'm already late for something. We'll catch up at some point later!" (and then BE GONE, looking good and smelling good and SMILING).
