He was in a superior position. That makes it a sexual harassment case no matter what she did. I know two people who walked away with a shitload of money from their Fortune 100 companies under the exact same scenario.
Still it varies by state. I wouldn't do anything without talking to lawyers. But ALWAYS document. Whether you end up needing it or not.
Breakaway the law is never black & white and it's never absolute, do you read what you even write ".... no matter what she did". Is that so?
So not everyone is held accountable for their actions that contributed to a specific situation?
She would be held accountable, you are mistaken if you think she would walk away scott free and on top of that, none of this would be private, news of this always leaks out, the scandal that is created by something like this causes poor work relations, I'm sure her employer would always have a different view of her along with her co-workers and she would have that stress to deal with too along with the fact that during this entire thread, her mental state has been at the forefront as one of the main issues.
".... no matter what she did"
Everyone has responsibility for their own actions, attempting to profit from these actions with the person you were involved in an affair with is just an extension of your questionable character should you choose to do something like this.
The assumption is he is stalking her, when in reality, the OM is the man she was involved with for an undetermined period of time and he has feelings to (arguably) and maybe he still wants her. Would we call the LBS a stalker because they continue to pursue their WAS with calls, texts, emails, etc.
What of Tristan? Would he want his world publicly revealed, everyone to know that his wife had an affair with someone she used to work with, enough damage has been caused already, I don't think it would be a good move to pursue something like this legally, would a couple hundred thousand dollars cover the cost of their pain? Would this help them on the path of reconciliation, continuing to focus on what happened during that affair and all the problems it created?
Nothing is ever cut & dried & absolute as the picture you tried to paint Breakaway, I think you know that from your own situation, no matter how small a role we played in an affair regardless if it was an EA or PA, we still played a role, we are responsible for that role.
Most of what you post Breakaway is usually good stuff, but every now & then I can't help but feel some angry part of you that crosses a few virtual lines - I think I get it (I could be wrong), you're still angry with the man you spent some time talking to (the quasi-emotional affair), but sometimes you project a little bit of that on to other situations and I'm not sure it's applicable in this case.
We can't blame the other person for getting emotionally involved with our spouses when they have an affair, we really can't. Our spouses put themselves in situations where an emotional connection was possible when they themselves were feeling weak but the responsibility is still there's alone.
Tristan, I would say just have your wife continue cutting off communications with the OM, no more phone calls, texts or emails and he will get the drift eventually - she's doing a good job of it thus far and it will eventually end.
