Sorry you find yourself here. BTW, thanks for stopping by my thread the other day, our sitches are similar in that it seemed that me and my W had a great M until early this year when she suddenly started acting aloof and at one point told me she had no time for herself anymore. She also started doing what I think someone in a post above said. It was like me, stuff we normally did, and her normal hobbies didn't matter anymore. She developed new hobbies that involved lots of going to restaurants, and personal interest classes in other cities by herself. She also started dressing really different and in a very flashy way. She became obsessed with clothes and other beauty items and spent tons of money on this. She also began staying out very late supposedly alone at these social events.
She also developed a "friendship" with a work colleague who also had an interest in her new hobbies. Later found and inordinate amount of TM going on between them. For most of the year, my gut was increasingly telling me that something was wrong. I asked her about A and she flatly denied it. I had her cell phone on my family plan and once she realized I could see her call and text history, she immediately broke the contract and got her own plan (HUGE billowing red flag). Later she admitted to being with someone once or twice but that there was no A. She still won't admit an ongoing A and she is about to go through with S.
I, like you, do not like snooping. However, the Internet and this forum are full of examples of common A red flags. It sucks to consider this potential outcome but if you are concerned of A and don't want to snoop, evaluate your wife and see if there are a lot of major changes that she has made.
