Thank you Optimist. I do not think you are being uncaring, but rather, very caring. One of H's biggest complaints is that I am impatient with him. He's been waiting almost 4 years for me to change, and I expect changes in a week, like you said. & like he says: you can't wait longer than 2 weeks!!!
I really wish I would not have opened my mouth!!! He also says he is sick of talking. Hello, K!! LISTEN!!
I do have depression/anxiety and am currently on Wellbutrin. I also take Ativan sometimes like 1/2 -2 mg a day. I should have taken one this morning and believe it or not, I took 2 yesterday!! At least I did not cry when we were talking which is a huge accomplishment. I waited until he wasn't around-like today I went out for sinus med. and straw for my dog houses. i am crying, but trying not to.
We are going to bike ride w/his friend. My face gets very red and blotchy from crying, and I don't want him to know!!
I struggle with my belief in God. I was going strong for a while (got saved in 94), went to church, prayed, but I kinda feel like I gave up. Need to get back in touch with God...and hand things over to him!
I'm not sure I know how to make myself happy. I am trying to do more for myself...
