... given that I wasn't around my laptop at all yesterday, I actually have had a really good few days GingAL.
Here's some craziness...
I started this exercise assigned by my IC of taking my joy and imagining it radiating from me in a pillar of light from me to my W and the OM (my IC can be cruel!) and then saying over-the-top prayers for them, such as "... and every single stop light will turn green right before they approach it..." etc. Making it over-the-top made it possible for me, as I have not been in a place to send either of them my light otherwise. Either way, in the process I prayed that W would have a connection with someone that would allow her to start becoming as healthy and beautiful as possible, whatever that is.
Fast fwd later in the day and my IC contacts me, asking if I am free Monday at 5:30 or 6ish for a meeting. I said yes and then he says, good, "we'll all meet then, if that's okay." He went on to clarify that my W met with him that morning (which surprised me, I thought she'd stop going after I went dark), and that she had essentially wanted to meet with IC and me. IC told her that that would only be possible if she was to completely sever ties with OM, as he doesn't go from IC to MC with couples if there is still an OM, reasoning that a M can't be worked out in the context of an ongoing EA or PA/SA. Apparently my W agreed that she would do just that.
IC contacted me today to outline what I should be prepared for and a little of what W and IC discussed (all with her permission), which included that our M was the top priority to W and that W needs to be able to share some things with me that she's always avoided sharing due to her fears, etc. This does not include anything about other men, and IC assured me that I have been given full disclosure regarding OPs etc. IC also stated that he has confirmed that W has completely severed ties (I'm guessing she CCd him an email???) with OM.
So we're meeting on Monday and we'll see what happens.
I did recieve a text last night from W that said, "I know ____ (IC) spoke with you and I'd like to speak with you about some things but if it needs to wait until Monday, I'm okay with that." Today after speaking with IC I texted back, "I look fwd to Monday "
This is all really strange for me, as the timing is so... well yesterday I believe was the first day that I truly found myself in a place that I was concerned just with me being the best me that I can be and not what W was doing, etc. I went to a potluck/party with a bunch of fellow students, socialized, had a blast, and from the moment I woke up I didn't focus on what W was up to or doing/not doing. Then in the middle of the day I got this information! I am not going to suddenly dance, sing, and rejoice. I am staying level headed and cautious about all of this, remembering to believe none of what I hear and only half of what I see at this point. Monday will be interesting, one way or another, and I'm going to do my best to "act as if."
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